Chicken Soup for the Soul Glow

This is Ted, tour manager for Bob Schneider, who I caught last night on a Rocks Off boat cruise. It takes Ted's 'fro one to two years to fully blossom, well worth it for a calling card every bit as memorable as Crystal Gayle's.

Also last night, Krysten (my friend's date) told about a different kind of formidable growth: she used to bartend in Kansas with a girl named Marge. Marge was six feet flat-footed. Instead of desperately trying to minimize, she strutted in high heels, license she'd earned after dealing with dwarfing others since 1st grade. When some of the regulars started calling her Marge-zilla. Krysten lit into them: how would you like it if someone made fun of your size, etc. Except it turns out the girl's legal name actually was “Marge Zilla”.

If you're big, be big. If you want to be big, be big. Make it out of 1st grade, and most people will be cool about it, and even if they're not, they can't insult you just by calling you what you are.